I am blessed to still have my husband with me and though life isn’t what we had planned for it to be, love gets us through. I hope to give hope and inspiration to other caregivers. Sometimes just knowing you are not alone brings comfort. Join me as I share my journey of love.
All the beautiful bushes and plants that make our yard so pretty were planted and tended by my hubby during the past 29 years. Up until three years ago, he could still do some of the gardening chores, but now he is limited.
Gardening is something he has always loved. In order for him enjoy his hobby, I help him outside with his portable oxygen, give him a yard waste container and a chair. Also important is a large container of ice water and a straw heat for shade!
Here he is a couple of days ago, resting between bouts of trimming the lilac bush. He managed to be outside for about 30 minutes. The exercise is good for him as well as the mental therapy.
Unfortunately, there are so few days he is able to get outdoors. If it is humid or extremely hot, his heart and lungs cannot handle the weather. We take advantage of the days he can enjoy the outdoor climate.
I’ve never been a gardener, nor has it ever been something I longed to do. Now, however, I do like taking care of the yard. To me it has become a labor of love, preserving what my beloved husband so lovingly created with God’s help.
Being a caregiver isn’t easy. Sometimes I feel sorry for myself and throw a pity party. These are short-lived because I know how lucky and blessed I am. When I was struggling the other night in the middle of a pity party, I reached for my collection of index card scriptures. I found Romans 12:12 and knew God had spoken to me. “Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.”
Our yard has been a work in progress. We decided to get rid of the ground cover around the pond, but I didn’t want to add more perennials. I knew hubby was eager to add to the vacant area, so we compromised with hanging pots, one on either side of the walkway. I love the heart planter, which you can’t see too well in this picture. It has purple flowers hanging inside. On the right side of the walkway, we have yellow flowers on the shepherd’s crook.
Hubby had been wanting to plant moss roses in the tiered planter he built a few years ago. We were lucky enough to find mixed colors in two flats.
Hubby had been eagerly looking forward to sitting in his chair outdoors and planting them on Friday morning. However, as the morning progressed, he began to suffer severely from shortness of breath. When he said he had to be realistic and he wouldn’t be able to plant the flowers, I knew we needed to head to VA.
The nurses were very concerned as just standing and turning to sit on the bed caused extreme breathing difficulties. The nurse turned his oxygen up to three from two and that seemed to stabilize him. A chest X-ray showed no fluid in his lungs and no change from the last X-ray on record.
His cardiologist said hubby is taking all the right medications, and basically there is nothing else that can be done. He changed his prescription on oxygen to three, though. Doctor said the erratic accelerated heart rate is caused by his heart going out of rhythm, but with hubby’s current health, there is no option availabe. We are not to worry unless it gets very high…200. So far it is in the very low 100′s and drops back to normal within a few minutes.
Hubby is doing much better now. I also changed the time he takes one of his meds to stop the drastic dropping of BP. Yesterday it was 71 over 46! Today his BP is normal.
I planted the moss roses for him. Though I have never been a gardener, I take joy in doing what I can to showcase the beauty from all the years of hubby’s planting and nurturing. Today I have become the nurturer.
Oh…can you find the cat in the first picture?
Hubby finished trimming the ornamental grass and helped with weeding this section of the garden around the pond. It took us three days, but all the weeding is now complete, and I put down nearly 100 bags of mulch around the gardens, both front and back yard areas.
After a couple days spent outdoors doing some physical work, hubby’s oxygen levels were good and his spirits were great!
Now we can relax and enjoy the back yard before the weather gets hot. He can sit on the deck and do his nebulizer, read the paper, and enjoy meals while looking at how beautiful all his hard work over the years has produced.
We are both strong in our faith and believe God never gives us more than we can handle. And we know we are not walking this path alone. At times He is carrying us.
Being a caregiver to someone with COPD and/or heart disease can be very exhausting both mentally and physically. You must learn as much as possible, and be sure to take time for yourself.
You can find some interesting FAQs for COPD caregivers here.
This week is unexpectedly beautiful. Sunshine, blue skies, and temps in the mid to high 70s. Perfect weather for my dear hubby. He is enjoying trips to the back yard to do his beloved yard work.
While it takes him a long time to accomplish a small task, it brings him pleasure and makes his gardening heart happy. Currently he is working on cutting back the ornamental grass around the pond. He sits in a lawn chair with his oxygen tank beside him. He has a large round tub to put the trimmings in. He gets fresh air, a sense of accomplishment and exercise, which is one of the most important pieces of his treatment plan.
Our yard is filled with beautiful landscaping–perennials, knock-out roses, butterfly bushes, lilac bushes, and so much more. Taking care of the yard was always my hubby’s pride and joy. I never did like yard work. I have allergies, am afraid of creepy crawly and flying insects and don’t like getting dirty. As I look out at what used to be a beautiful display of my hubby’s green thumb, I see weeds…so many weeds I want to cry. But I’m working on getting them cleared out and learning how to better take care of the things he and God planted. And, even more important, my hubby is helping.
In a few months, the humidity will rise and the temps will soar. This is a bad time for hubby to be out of the air conditioning. So, we make the best of the times when God gives us “perfect” weather.
One thing to remember when you are a caregiver is to take time out for yourself. In order to remain strong to do what needs to be done, your mind and spirit need to rejuvenate.
Sometimes, like today, I have lunch with a friend while my hubby takes a nap or watches a movie. I have my cell phone where he can call me if he needs me and I am always within a few minutes of home. But those precious minutes with my friend are uplifting. We talk about things I can’t express to my loved one, we laugh, and sometimes we cry. I always come home refreshed.
My hubby has COPD, but has recently also been diagnosed with a bad heart. His poor heart is damaged from previous heart attacks and it is only pumping at 35% instead of 55%. Thus, he isn’t receiving enough oxygen into his bloodstream. Doing anything, even walking a few steps, makes it difficult for him to breathe. With his dual condition of heart failure and COPD, the doctors have to work closely together to determine the correct medications and treatment.
My hubby is a people person. He has never known a stranger, and he loves to talk! Talking is difficult, too. It take a lot of wind to push the words out at a level others can hear. He struggles and he gets lonely. So do I.
We are blessed to have our time together and make the most of each day.
Here are some tips provided by the American Heart Association to help you keep yourself renewed.
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Copyright 2013 by Carol Ann Erhardt
© 2013 - Carol Ann Erhardt
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