I have a disease that can’t be seen, and can easily be ignored. I was diagnosed with diabetes about 9 years ago. Type 2 diabetes which seems to be common after a certain age. Maybe for those like me who spent their years ingesting a lot of carbs. I grew up eating fried potatoes, fried chicken, fried fish…fried everything. Mashed potatoes with lots of gravy. We had vegetables with some meals. We had salads when the gardens produced during the summer months, but usually that consisted of sliced tomatoes. Bread was a major part of my growing up years. I loved the long loaves of Vienna or French bread my parents would purchase at the market when they traveled to St. Louis. Oh, and the yummy cheeses! How I loved cheese. We didn’t do candy, but sometimes there was pie or cake for dessert. I remember eating a small dish of canned fruit as my bedtime snack.

So when I moved out into the world, I had a good start on my love of carbs. A body can only take so much abuse. Eventually, it becomes unable to process those carbs by producing enough insulin to counteract. Thus, I am now a diabetic who takes meds and has the knowledge of what this silent disease does to my body. It affects my major organs, like heart and kidneys. Some people with diabetes wind up on dialysis because their kidneys stop working properly. Some will lose limbs or eyesight.

When I was diagnosed, I kept telling myself I had to eat according to plan or I could become one of the unfortunates. I kept a journal with everything I ate: carbs, sodium, protein, calories. I read labels. And I lost 13 pounds. Before I became tired. So tired of tracking everything. So tired of denying myself the foods I craved…comfort foods. I stopped tracking.

I have tried to get back to tracking, because without doing so it is easy to ignore the amount of carbs one is ingesting. Easy to ignore I have this thing called diabetes. The disease is silent for someone like me who doesn’t always feel different when there is a high or low. I’m 80 years old, live alone, and the last thing I want to do is cook or deal with back pain by standing to make a salad. And it is a chore to think about looking up the values of all the ingredients I use in making a meal.

BUT, I don’t want to lose a foot or leg. I don’t want my eyesight to get worse. I don’t want to have to take insulin to regulate my blood sugar. So I need to weigh these “don’ts” agains the “don’t want to’s.” And I need to pray. I am not strong enough to do this battle without Jesus. I made a goal for myself to ride my stationary bike for ten minutes after breakfast and lunch, and to ride for 20 miles after dinner each day during the week. I do this while I’m watching something on television or listening to an audio book. I’m taking the weekends off because there has to be a reward for working so hard. Others might prefer taking a walk. If I didn’t have arthritis in my knees, ankles, and back, I’d like to walk, too. But that puts me out of commission. No stress exercise is necessary. I’m going to attempt to track my dietary intake. I need to make it fun, so I’m looking for a method that appeals to my creative side. Maybe some form of journaling.

I’m writing this in hopes that someone else who has this disease and is getting discouraged, will feel encouraged to take steps to halt the invisible damage going on inside their bodies. Doing this alone is not easy. If you have someone to share the journey with, please do. And please, please, don’t lie to yourself. Take responsibility for your health. And begin today. You are worth it.